Come Thou Fount-Jadon Lavik

I'd much prefer to listen to Sufjan's arrangement, but I won't turn this song down if it comes my way. I think I've always understood this hymn because of the truth it speaks. These words seem to give voice to my heart's stirrings lately:

Let thy goodness, like a fetter

bind my wandering heart to thee.

Prone to wander, Lord, I feel it,

prone to leave the God I love;

here's my heart, oh take and seal it,

seal it for thy courts above.

If I were to put these words into my own, I think I'd say, "God, let your goodness be the chain that binds my seeking heart to you. I feel a tendency to search elsewhere for Truth, to search for something else besides you, the one I love most. Please take this heart, my heart, and make it yours. Put your name on my heart, and get it ready for the days I will forever spend with you in Heaven." 

Tonight, I'm extremely melancholy. I've been overly sensitive, emotional, and extremely off for the last couple days. I could excuse it all by saying I'm just tired and overworked, but really, I think my heart has been wandering. I'm desiring this big, blow-you-away love, but I haven't been looking to the Lover who gives me that every day. I want that joy back that I had not too long ago. It was a simple joy-a joy that looked for Jesus in every day and in every thing. Maybe these few days have just been a process of realizing Jesus is really all I ever want and need. I'm not satisfied with anything else, even if I strongly think I will be. So tonight, I'm thankful for a good, stable Father. In my wandering, he is always there to affirm Truth. I think I need to be done with this moody, emotional Jess. Onto a different attitude and a different focus. Jesus.